I’ve been having lots of thoughts recently, involving emotions. Positive emotions. Mushy even. I’m not entirely sure how to process it all after close to two years of taking every possible positive feeling that dared rear it’s head, shoving it into a box and tossing said box far, far away. Almost like Pandora’s box in reverse. Hope was one thing I refused to allow myself. It seemed a bit too costly. A major waste of time and energy. In part, there was also a measure of cowardice involved.
Unboxing those feelings and allowing myself to feel, to hope, again has been challenging,but it feels like I’m on the cusp of a change for the better. I may edit this a bit later, but that’s all for now. I’m achy, sleepy and hoping tonight’s pain will pass.